Everything you wished you knew before picking out a dildo. Whether you’re a beginner or a veteran masturbator.
For thousands of years we humans, both women and men, have found unique ways to pleasure ourselves. Carved and polished stones and wood to help get us through those cold and lonely nights. Around 2000 years ago the ancient Greeks and Romans would make phallic objects out of bakery goods. Bread and orgasms, what’s not to love about that?
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Getting off is an art just as much as it is a science.
You’re a goddess that deserves all the pleasures your panty line can deliver. This article is for the women and bold men(prostate orgasms, OMG) who are ready to take the plunge (Sometimes literally) into the world of orgasmic ecstasy. You’re going to like the way you pleasure yourself, we guarantee it!
Using your fingers to rub one off is like only watching half of 50 Shades of Grey with fat-free popcorn and then cutting it off. Some of us girls are one finger, some two, and for the adventurous sometimes three. None of it can match the intensity of the proper use of a good dildo. Without further ado, here is our list of the best dildos.
Contents
Dildo Reviews
5. Realistic Silicone Dildo
You really can’t go wrong with a good, realistic silicone dildo. It’s an absolute timeless classic. From the perfectly shaped balls and scrotum, the veiny shaft, all the way up to the bulbous head.
The circumference is a sizeable 4 inches. That’s slightly under the average erect penis circumference. It’s not thick or girthy by any means, but it is thick enough to hit the right spots. The insertable length is a comfortable 5.5 inches. The suction cup is convenient if you’re looking for a hands-free experience. Stick it to the floor or wall and ride your way to an orgasm.
If you’re a beginner or prefer a slender cock, this is one of the most realistic dildos.
4. Clone a Willy – Your Very Own Homemade Dildo
This aptly named product is more of a homemade arts and crafts project than an actual dildo. It’s silicone which is body safe and very simple to figure out. Have you ever had a partner with the absolute perfect penis? The shape, the size, the curvature. He filled you up and hit you in all the right spots. CLONE HIS WILLY! As much as we’d like to lay in bed all day making love, sometimes life and responsibilities get in the way.
My partner and I had a ton of fun cloning his dick. Things got a little messy, but it’s a memory that I cherish. As far as homemade dildo’s go, the Clone a Willy is perfect.
3. G-Spot Seeker Dildo
Ah, the g-spot, I still have fond memories of my first attempt to find it, and harness its power. Like a treasure hunt but instead of gold, you get a rush of tingles and sensations.
For many women focusing on the g-spot is the only way to reach a vaginal orgasm. Many sex toys are specificaly designed to hit that sweet love spot. Really good stuff!
If you’re really into g-spot orgasms, getting a g-spot vibrator works much better than a toy penis.
2. Tantus Alan Vibrating Dildo
Nothing like good vibrations sent directly to your g-spot. The Tantus Alan vibrating dildo is truly amazing. A small bullet vibrator is inserted into the cock. Don’t let the size of the vibrator fool you, that motor is strong.
My favorite part of purchasing any Tantus product is how their company views sex toys. The materials in all Tantus products are very safe and health conscious. They have an amazing warranty program and stand by their products totally.
The only hitch, it’s quite a bit more expansive than the others. Sure, a motor and rechareable battery should add to the cost. However, a girls gotta eat, ya know.
If you’re looking for a great looking, realistic, and fun dildo you can’t go wrong with the Tantus. It’s also durable enough to last a lifetime. This is definitely one of the best dildos.
1. Icicles No5. Sapphire Spiral Glass Dildo
Now I know what you’re thinking. That glass, vaginas, and bums make for poor bedfellows. On the contrary, glass is a great material.
Glass dildos are made from toughened or tempered glass. Without getting too technical, it basically means they are really hard to break. You could even drop them on the floor and they should be fine. No matter how strong your kegel game is, there is no chance you could break it while it’s inside you.
Tempered glass is completely non-porous so there is no chance of bacteria, mold, or mildew building up and ruining your toy or harming your body. Any Smells will easily wash away. It’s so easy to clean and maintain. This is my best dildo, and at times, my best friend in the world.
Choosing The Right Material
Just as you wouldn’t eat junk food or food that has fallen to the ground, you also need to be aware of what you are putting inside your most delicate of body parts. Not all dildos are made from the same material, and some material is more superior for different applications than others. The qualities you want to see in a good sex toy are hypoallergenic, hygienic, and durable.
In this section, we’ll discuss which materials are safest and healthiest, and also include some bonus tips for anal play. Because come on, we can’t neglect our asses, and we know you have thought about it at least once. Let’s get started with the breakdown.
- Silicone Dildos: This material gets a big five stars from us because it’s perfect for both vaginal and anal loving. It’s a non-porous dildo that will not keep bacteria if you wash it off. We particularly like soft silicone dildos that will fill you up, but you can get stiff silicone dildos as well.
- Metal, Glass, and Ceramic Dildos: Orgasms are better when you enjoy them with the company of friends. If you’re looking to host, we would recommend hard materials such as glass because glass dildos can be sanitized quickly between uses among multiple people. They are non-porous and won’t retain a buildup of bacteria or smell.
- Thermoplastic Rubber: This material is formed through a process called injection molding. There are way too many chemicals for our taste, and it’s a porous material that can hold bacteria. To be on the safe side, we recommend using condoms over top of these dildos, especially when you’re using them in a group.
- Real skin Dildo Kits: These dildos come with everything but cum, pun intended. They are great if you are a one cock girl because they can take the shape of your lover and provide pleasure when they’re not around. The only caveat is that the materials vary, and we recommend you seek silicone.
- Polyvinyl chloride (PVC): We saved this material for last because it has to be one of the worst elements for a dildo. PVC puts off a toxic gas, has tiny pores where bacteria can spawn and doesn’t always glide well into your love canals. It’s cheap and you get what you pay for, an unhealthy product.
OMG, who knew there was so much science behind fucking yourself. Now that we know what type of materials are right for us it is time to venture into other aspects of choosing the perfect dildo for you.
Sorry Boys, The Size of a Dildo Matters
The person who said that size doesn’t matter wasn’t talking about our little love sticks. When you initially think about pleasing yourself, you may imagine a hard dick thrusting itself deep inside. Who doesn’t want to feel it deep? The truth is a little different though.
Ladies and gentlemen, I’m here to tell you that it is the girth of the phallic object and not the length that gives you that “filled-up” feeling.
So What Size is Right for Me?
That depends on your sexual experience and your ability to relax. I’m going to assume no virgins are lining up to put dildos up their love holes, but just in case I would recommend a lot of lube if you’re not sexually experienced. Let me repeat it, lube.
We recommend starting with about one inch in diameter for your dildo and then increasing it up to 3 to 4 inches depending on your preferences. Don’t worry; there’s no way for your vagina to get loose. If you don’t tear anything which is to say you don’t put something in there larger than a baby’s head, your vagina will go back to its original size.
Anal play is no different. If you want to take one up the bum, we recommend starting with quality butt plugs so that you can get used to the feeling. It’s unique and can be uncomfortable at first. Use a lot of lube and a silicone or metal dildo. Curved dildos can help men reach their prostate and women find their G spot through there a thin layer of tissue.
How To Use A Dildo
My name is Jules, a lover of all things orgasmic and sexy. As a woman, I find it convenient to be able to love myself. When apps fail, and my Knight in shining armor can’t find a horse, I can always rely on Mr. Dildo to send me to new heights.
Put on some Michael Bublé and let me tell you how I do it.
Never rush. You must have enough respect for yourself to allocate time that’s just for you. A period to dim the lights, take a hot bath and know you have secured the timeless asset of privacy. I choose a silicone dildo that’s 3 inches in diameter and has strategically placed ridges.
Once I rub myself down, and the tide comes adrift, I’m comfortable to use my little friend effectively. You may not be able to cuddle your dildo, well hell maybe you can, but it will always be there for you.
Pro Tip: Place your dildo in the fridge for 5 minutes for temperature play.
What Dildo Style Should You Choose?
There are dozens upon dozens of different styles of dildos on the market for all genders. We’re going to break down some of the most commercially available, and dildos that we find are the most applicable to the general population.
- Realistic Dildos: This style of dildo can be your daily driver. They look and feel like the real thing. We love them because you can get them molded to the shape of your partner’s penis. That means you will always be comfortable, and your significant other will know just how committed you are to them.
- Double-Ended Dildos: Sometimes it takes two to tango as the saying goes. Double-ended dildos are perfect for lesbian and same-sex couples to experience dual orgasms. For solo play, you can use one end to penetrate your vagina and the other end to stimulate your ass. It’s quite the experience!
- Vibrating Dildos: These are hybrid dildos that come in an array of colors, and we would not recommend them for beginners. If you’re looking to spice up your toy collection, then vibration is the next step. You can also get them with clit stimulation extensions to. However, for the most part, if you’re looking for a toy that vibrates, it’s almost always better to go with a rabbit vibe.
- G-Spot Stimulators: This type of dildo has an odd shape to it, and it’s designed with the curve to better assist you in finding that treasured G spot. They are not very realistic, but the orgasms generated from them will give you a new reason to call yourself a woman.
- Squirting Dildos: These fun and messy toys take it to the next level. They come(ha) with fake man-juice. Whenever you want them to “cum”, you simply use a pumping mechanism attachment. Seconds later you’ll be drenched heads to toe. If you love facials and body shots, this may be worth the experience.
I hope you were not too disappointed that we didn’t list any bakery goods. Unfortunately, in this day and age, we don’t have bakeries baking phallically shaped parcels ready to pleasure your sense. Sad, I know.
Wrapping Up This Pleasure Cruise
Our final advice that we would like to leave you is always to make sure that you clean your toys with certified bacteria killing cleanser wipes. Some material like silicone can be placed inside a dishwasher. Still, practice safe sex which means putting condoms on your dildos if you’re sharing them in a group.
Hopefully you’ve found our list of the best dildos helpful to make an informed purchase.
Most importantly, have fun getting off and comment below with your own experiences. We would love to hear from the community.
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